5 Red Flags Your Relationship Is Toxic

Guys DO NOT miss these signs.

When we’re in the thick of our day-to-day life with an *******, we don’t see the long-term negative impact our relationship has on our mood, self-esteem, self-confidence, values, goals and our other meaningful relationships.

We can transform from a motivated, healthy, happy person into a miserable, snivelling wreck no one wants to be around without even knowing its happening.

This tends to remind you of the story of the frog who is put in a pool of cool water. He doesn’t realize it’s actually a pot on a stove that is slowly coming to boil. He’s cooked and ready to eat before he even knows it. And I don’t think we want to turn into a delicious pair of frog legs on our toxic roustabout’s silver platter.

In this post I 5 outline red flags that your relationship is toxic.

Let’s jump right into it.


  1. Friends and Family Don’t like Who You’ve Become When with Your Woman.

It’s a red flag when your family doesn’t like your girl, but that reaction can cut both ways.

Have you ever had someone who really loves you, someone who truly has your back, say something like this to you:

“It’s not that I don’t like your girlfriend/lover/spouse. It’s just that I don’t like who you become when you’re with him. I feel like you’re not being your true self”?

I can’t tell you how many times I heard some variation of that line from friends and family while I was dating each of my heartbreakers. But I was in denial because I was neck-deep in an oxytocin-dopamine tsunami of addiction to the relationships and didn’t want to look too closely at what they were costing me.

You do not want to be in a position where you start digging through her personal papers and letters, driving hours to see if she was really where she said she was, then driving back without her even knowing If you been there. You will end up being transformed into a neurotic Geisha when your girl is around and a complaining harridan when she wasn’t in sight.

Marginalize closest people in your life and isolate toxic relationship in your life and let them intervene if they see that you in a toxic relationship.


  1. You Become Unreliable and Inconsistent.

When the woman we love is inconsistent and unreliable, we can often mirror him, becoming unreliable and inconsistent with everyone except our Juliet. For her, we’ll make ourselves available at a ping, waiting hours or days for him to deign to see us. But then we start being late for or cancelling appointments with friends, family, work and colleagues in order to be forever on-call for our unpredictable *******.


And as we wait at the beck and call of our lover, other meaningful relationships fall by the wayside.

People stop calling because they know we’ll throw them over the second our rascal crooks his little finger. Pretty soon our lives become small, insular and lonely. And isolation is the worst thing that can happen to a relationship addict.

  1. You Do Weird Things to Affirm the Relationship.

Anyone might predict a wonderful future for you and your heartbreaker if you can just figure out how to control her. Worse, you might rely on the wrong self-help book that affirms your choice to stay in your heart-stomping situation with the false belief you can influence your man by applying the tools presented within.

You tend to invest in nonsense like John Gray’s still-popular Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus was my Bible. Those books and tools


What I didn’t realize was that when you’re the only one scratching and fighting for the relationship, Gray’s advice can prolong your tolerance for very bad behaviour and keep you in purgatory indefinitely. The reality is, a relationship is only as good as the person who tries the least.

  1. You Turn the Narcissist’s Breadcrumbs into a Rustic Loaf.

The longer we stay in toxic circumstances, the more we deplete our jet fuel and self-worth. Until soon we’re giving the scoundrel credit for doing the absolute minimum to keep our relationship slogging along. Men trapped in soul-numbing situations are extraordinary bakers. They can take their chap’s breadcrumbs and whip them into a rustic loaf because they desperately want to justify staying with her.


  1. You Become Addicted to the Cycle of Abuse.

It’s important, that I make it very clear that I’m talking about emotional abuse. If you’re in a physically abusive relationship put this down right now and immediately seek help. The National Domestic Violence Helpline is at 0800 150 150.


9 Tips for Happy, Long Lasting Relationships

Have you ever made silly mistakes that ruined great relationships?

Since making my own mistakes in the past, I’ve read a lot about the science of how to have happy and long lasting relationships—whether it’s with romantic partners, family, or friends. Below, I’d like to share 12 science-based tips to help you avoid disconnection and make your relationships flourish!


  1. Be honest.


Any issues you avoid, or truths you don’t want to acknowledge, will likely undermine your relationship. It’s better to face the truth squarely in the face right now and address it, rather than let it sabotage your relationship in the long run.


For that reason, be intentional and figure out the truth about your relationship. Think through all aspects of it—your feelings and thoughts, the other person’s feelings and thoughts, as well as their external context. If you notice yourself flinching away from a certain aspect of reality, this is the time to double down your focus and really get at the truth.


  1. Avoid “failing at their mind.”


One of the biggest dangers in close relationships is assuming the other person is exactly the same as you in their feelings and thoughts — in other words, “failing at their mind.” At times, our emotional self just doesn’t want to accept that the person we’re so close to is actually different from us—sometimes very different. I know I’ve made this mistake, and it has cost me dearly in the past. So how do we avoid it?


  1. Use Tell Culture.


Tell Culture is a communication strategy where you are open and honest with close people in your life about your feelings, thoughts, and what’s going on with you. This makes you more vulnerable and authentic. Tell them information about yourself that you think they’d want to know.


For example, if you want a hug, tell the other person that you’d enjoy a hug. However, in order for Tell Culture to work, it’s really important for you not to expect the other person to hug you. Rather, you are simply responsible for telling them about your needs and desires,. They are then free to act as they choose, based on their own needs and desires.


  1. Remove communication barriers.


For open and honest communication to work, you need to remove communication barriers. Figure out your individual communication preferences and then compromise on something that works well for both of you.


  1. Practice emotional attunement.


As you communicate with each other, don’t listen only to what the other person is saying, but also to the emotions underneath the words. Notice whether the other person seems stressed, frazzled, sad, frustrated, confused, pleased, glad, joyful, etc.


Pay attention to the tone of the voice, body language, and what is not being said, as well as the content of the words. Such emotional attunement will level up your ability to understand the other person and respond in ways that lead to happy, long lasting relationships.


  1. Check in on your relationships.


This is a magic-bullet solution to so many relationship problems! Schedule systematic meetings to talk about the state of your relationship and what can be improved.


For example, my wife and I have a relationship check-in every two weeks. We first talk about what we appreciated most about each other during the last two weeks. Then, we discuss what can be improved in our relationship, and how to do so. Finally, we finish up with gratitude to each other for doing the relationship check-in and have some delicious chocolate to reward ourselves. This has done wonders for improving our relationship!


  1. Trust others.


All of these strategies will help you build up trust, which is key to having happy, lasting relationships. Always keep a personal evaluation of your relationship’s level of trust in the back of your mind. How much do you trust the other person to act in ways that match your mental model of that person? How much do you trust that person to have your back?


If you want an intentional relationship, then do things to build trust and gather information about the other person’s trustworthiness. Exhibit vulnerability and openness, share secrets, and be generous in your offers to compromise. If the other person shows themselves trustworthy, then commit more to the relationship. If they do not, then re-evaluate your own level of commitment, as the relationship likely will not work in the long term.


  1. Respect boundaries and privacy.


Technological developments make it so easy for us to track each other and to be in constant communication. However, permitting each other to have privacy, as well as not pushing the other person to do things they’d prefer not to do, helps increase happiness in relationships, since it builds up mutual trust.


  1. Have healthy conflicts.


Surprise—conflicts can be healthy in relationships! If you go into a relationship expecting never to fight, then your first fight could very well lead to the end of the relationship. Instead, learn strategies for healthy conflict resolution, and talk about them with the other person beforehand.

Also, when a conflict does arise, start by highlighting how much you care about the other person and the relationship. Talk about both the facts and how you feel about them.

Avoid the blame game, and instead, be as generous as possible when interpreting the other person’s actions. Be open to changing your mind if you discover you made the mistake, and apologize quickly and profusely.

Avoid focusing on the past and instead orient toward better behaviour in the future. At the end of any conflict, focus on reconnecting and rebuilding emotional bonds strained by the conflict. We hope this technique to be so helpful in resolving tensions between us!

For Men’s Health Clinics services, Penis Enlargements, Weak Erections and more… contact us today.



5 Ways Running Benefits Your Health

Running is one of the most straightforward ways to get the important benefits of exercise, it’s easily accessible without the need to sign up to a gym and is a great way to help improve cardiovascular health. Here are 5 key ways in which running can benefit your health.


  1. Burns calories

Running helps to burn calories which can aid with weight loss or maintenance of your weight. The burning of calories even continues after you stop your run. Once you have finished running, your body’s metabolism can continue to burn more calories than when at complete rest.


  1. Strengthens muscles

Running strengthens your muscles. Even though running is primarily an aerobic activity, you still use a variety of muscles which will increase in their strength, tone and endurance. Running is an effective core workout, as it works and tones the muscles of your torso, the muscles from your pelvis to the shoulder and the abdominal, lower back, pelvis and hip muscles, to keep your spine aligned as you run.


  1. Improves mood

Feel-good brain chemicals and hormones such as serotonin and dopamine are produced when you run. This can help to reduce stress, anxiety and depression and make you feel happier. Concentration, memory and sleep also improve which in turn leads for a happier you!


  1. Increases cardiovascular health

Muscles get stronger with regular exercise, and it is important to remember the heart is also a muscle, therefore, the same rule applies. But just like other muscles, after intense exercise, you need to give yourself rest period to allow the heart time to recover.

Running can reduce your risk of heart disease by up to 35%. This can also mean a reduction in blood pressure and ‘bad cholesterol’ which also helps keep your heart healthy.


  1. Strengthens joints and bones

Running not only strengthens muscles but also strengthens your joints and bones too (including your knees!) Running increases bone mass and can help to prevent age-related bone loss such as osteoarthritis. So, despite hearing many people say ‘running can be bad for your knees’, studies show that running can actually improve knee health.

For men’s health-related problems, call us for appointment today!.

Covid-19: How to put on, use, take off and dispose of a mask


Source: https://sacoronavirus.co.za/2020/03/31/covid-19-how-to-put-on-use-take-off-and-dispose-of-a-mask/

Is COVID-19 an airborne virus?

The WHO has disputed claims that COVID-19 is airborne
What we know is:
– COVID-19 is a droplet infection.
– Droplets can spread to those who are in close proximity with an infected person.
– Droplets can remain on some surfaces for up to 12 hours.
– It is therefore important to practice social distancing and good hygiene to prevent becoming infected.

Source: https://sacoronavirus.co.za/2020/04/01/is-covid-19-an-airborne-virus/

How Weak erection can affect your relationship

How Weak erection can affect your relationship

Erection problems don’t just affect men – they can also have a real impact on a partner and a relationship as well.

And they’re more common than you may think. It’s estimated that half of all men between the ages of 40 and 70 suffer from erectile dysfunction (ED) to some degree – with this rising to 7 in 10 men aged 70 and above.

What are erection problems?

An erection problem is the inability to sustain an erection which is good enough for a man to achieve penetration or orgasm.

Some people are able to masturbate with a relatively soft penis and still achieve orgasm, but it may well not be good enough for penetration. It also depends on what kind of sex you’re having.

ED or Weak Erection can be caused by a number of issues including hormonal imbalance, a restriction in the flow of blood to the penis and psychological causes such as stress, anxiety and depression.

The impact of weak erection in a relationship

Men can often feel quite frustrated about not being able to achieve an erection and it can be very demasculinising – the fact that they may see this as a symbol of their fertility and manliness and they’re not able to achieve it on demand.

This can be cause by pressure like pornography or people writing about having having better sex for longer in the media. Often the reality is that if you’re stressed, have had a busy day, have eaten late and the kids are screaming and then you try to have sex, it’s just not going to happen.

Female partners will worry that they’re not attractive enough or that their husband is having an affair and can’t get an erection because he is having sex elsewhere. But this is unlikely to be the cause.

And sometimes a woman may be concerned that her partner is addicted to porn – which can be an issue and can occasionally be the case where you can’t get an erection in real life.

However, again, there are other more likely explanations.

Talking with your partner about erectile problems

Of course, erection problems can be a difficult issue for couples to discuss – but talking openly can often be the best way of resolving stress and identifying underlying causes. Talking about what’s going on is a much better approach than pretending erectile problems aren’t happening or just avoiding sex without giving a reason.

Communicate openly with your partner and accept that your relationship and sex life aren’t always going to be perfect and being relaxed about that you’ll have a healthy relationship that allows you to talk.

Realise that this isn’t going to be forever and perhaps examine your lifestyle together, which is such a big factor for erectile problems.

Look at things that you can change in your life and ask your partner to support you. It could be eating better, stopping smoking, exercising more or reducing stress levels. Or, perhaps you need to just find time for each other, where you’re not focused on kids, pets or work.

Change the way you think about sex

Consider having other forms of sex that does not involve penetration.

When should you get help?

If you have persisting difficulty with erections or you have had issues for longer than two to three months, get checked. Simply book an appointment with us.

We will be able provide you with a solutions related to your weak erection today.

4 things to know about Whisky Dick

4 things to know about Whiskey Dick

Whiskey Dick – It’s a Friday night (and you already know where this is going). You and your girlfriend have been at the bar for a few hours and then, out of the corner of your eye, you see it. The look. The “we-should-probably-go-back-to-my-place-right-f*ckin-now” look. You feel good, and things are going great — that is, until you get back to your place, fumble with your belt buckle, and find, after hours of trying, that you just cannot get erect.

That’s because you have whiskey dick, or the inability to get an erection after a night of heavy drinking.
Whiskey dick is a real thing: though booze may make you feel like you’re the king of the sex gods, that feeling belies what’s actually going on in your body.

Alcohol is a depressant, it decrease the blood flow to the penis and if your body is trying to get rid of all the booze in your system, it will be focusing on that, not on getting hard.

Life’s greatest pleasures are cocktails and orgasms. The key is to enjoy them both responsibly. If you have an issue getting an erection and maintaining it when sober check contact us for consultation.

Below is what you need to know about Whiskey Dick and how to prevent it.

1. Alcohol is not always the enemy

Chances are, you have had a wold, tipsy sex before without whiskey dick rearing it angry, flaccid head. That’s because in moderate amounts, alcohol can be helpful.

In the even that you did actually get hard despite drinking heavily, it does not mean you are home free. Sometimes after heavily drinking you might find that if you have an orgasm, its significantly less pleasurable than usual.

2. Don’t panic if it happens just once.

If it’s only once after you accidentally got too drunk, whiskey dick is probably not indicative of a major problem.
But if it starts to happen more regularly, however its worth talking to your partner.

That said, if you have a hard time getting erect even without booze — or if even the tiniest bit of alcohol causes a problem —you should consider consulting a men’s health clinic specialist.

It might also mean there are other issues at play. Your penis actually can tell you quite a bit about your health, and that erectile issues might be warning signs for potential vascular problems.

Ultimately, alcohol can be a reward for a day well spent, anything over [2 drinks a night regularly] should be called into question, and [men] may have other issues that call them to look to alcohol as a way to relieve stress. Sex is a great way to release stress, and as long as everybody’s consenting, it’s probably the best way to relieve stress there is.

3. Just because its called “Whiskey Dick” does not mean whiskey is the only culprit

Whiskey isn’t the only alcoholic beverage to give you erectile dysfunction — and no, that doesn’t mean you have a free pass to imbibe fruity rum beverages.

The more alcohol you have in your body, the more issues you may have with your sexual performance, and certain beverages contain higher percentages of alcohol by volume, which means you can drink more alcohol without getting as intoxicated.

Think about it this way: a single beer has a lower ABV than straight-up whiskey (or a cocktail with multiple shots in it), so imbibing something like a beer or glass of wine is probably.

4. Years of drinking can hurt you in the long run

Years of binge-drinking might turn that episode of whiskey dick into a more frequent occurrence.

Chronic alcoholism not only can permanently impact erections, it can change your hormonal balance.

In fact, a 2007 study revealed that “chronic and persistent alcohol use” led to sexual dysfunction in men, including erectile dysfunction, low sexual desire, and premature ejaculation.A study confirmed that long-term alcohol use can impact male hormones, and another substantiated that it can affect fertility and semen quality.

The more you drink, the lower your testosterone will be and the higher your estrogen levels will be. That can potentially lead to a slew of unfortunate side effects, like a decreased sex drive.

For weak erection, pre-mature ejaculation and men’s health related issues contact us today

10 SEX health Benefits

10 SEX health Benefits

10 SEX health Benefits

Sex not only feels good, it is also good for you.

In this post we outline sex health benefits.

  1. Eases Stress

Being close to your partner can soothe stress and anxiety.

Sex and intimacy can boost your self-esteem and happiness, too. It’s not only a prescription for a healthy life, but a happy one.

  1. Improves Sleep

You may nod off more quickly after sex, and for good reason. After orgasm, the hormone prolactin is released, which is responsible for the feelings of relaxation and sleepiness


  1. Count as Exercise

Sex is a really great form of exercise. Yes it won’t replace the treadmill, but it counts for something.

Sex uses about five calories per minute, four more calories than watching TV. It gives you a one-two punch, It bumps up your heart rate and uses various muscles.

So get busy! You may even want to clear your schedule to make time for it on a regular basis. Like with exercise, consistency helps maximize the benefits.


  1. Lowers Heart Attack Risk

Good sex life is good for your heart. It helps to raise your heart rate and helps to keep your estrogen and testosterone levels in balance. If one of this are low you begin to get lots of problems one of them being heart disease.


  1. Lessens Pain

Before you reach for an aspirin, ty for an orgasm. Orgasm can block pain.

Orgasm release a hormone that helps raise your pain threshold.

Many women have confirmed that genital self-stimulation can reduce menstrual cramps.


  1. May Make Prostate Cancer Less Likely


Men who ejaculated frequently – at least 21 times a month were less likely to get prostate cancer during one study, which was published in the Journal of the American Medical Association.

You don’t need a partner to reap this benefit: Sexual intercourse, nocturnal emission, and masturbation were all part of the equation.

  1. Boosts Your Libido

For men having sex will make sex better and help improve your libido thus adding to more lively sex life.

For women, having sex ups viginal lubrication, blood flow and elasticity. All of this make sex feel better and help you crave more of it.


  1. Improves Women’s Bladder Control

A strong pelvic floor is important for avoiding incontinence, something that will affect about 30% of women at some point in their lives.

Good sex is like a workout for your pelvic floor muscles. When you have an orgasm, it causes contractions in those muscles, which strengthens them.


  1. Lowers Your Blood Pressure

Research suggests a link between sex and lower blood pressure. One landmark study found that sexual intercourse specifically (not masturbation) lowered systolic blood pressure. That’s the first number on your blood pressure test.


  1. Helps Keep Your Immune System Humming

People who have sex have higher levels of what defends your body against germs, viruses, and other intruders.

You should still do all the other things that make your immune system happy such as:

  • East right
  • Get enough sleep
  • Stay active
  • Keep up with you vaccinations
  • Use a condom if you don’t know both of your STD statuses


Fact About Relationships

7 Fact About Relationships to know Before you get Married

I would hate to be pessimistic when it comes to love, but it alone is not enough to sustain a marriage. Research suggests that to truly make a marriage last, one needs to be smart and conscientious in how you love your partner. To that end, we have gathered 7 Fact About Relationships every couple should know about before they get married.

  1. Sharing the chores equals more sex

Sharing household chores could make for really hot sex life. This study found that couples who divvy up cleaning tasks reported higher relationships satisfaction and got busy more often than couples who left it to one partner.

Apparently, when men in the study felt they were making fair contributions to household chores, the couple had more sex and each partner reported more sexual satisfaction.

  1. Men really benefit from getting married.

Research has suggested that men, in particular, benefit from married life.

A major survey of 127,545 American adults found that married men are healthier than men who never tied the knot or whose marriages ended in divorce or widowhood. They also live longer!

  1. Divorce may be contagious.

People you surround yourself with matter quiet a bit, divorce can work like a social contagion spreading among friends and families. Pay attention this in your life, if someone in your social network say your friend or cousin break ups, the likelihood od ending up in divroce court yourself increase by 75%.

Individuals who get divorced may influence not only their friends, but also their friends’ friends as the propensity to divorce spreads.”

  1. Marriage is good for your heart.

Research suggests getting married is at least heart healthy.

In one recent study out of New York University’s Lagone Medical Center, researchers found that married men and women had a five percent lower chance of cardiovascular disease compared to single folks.

Why’s that? It may be because married people have better emotional support and deeper social ties to family, which in turn produces lower blood pressure and general heart health.


  1. Arguing over finances early on doesn’t bode well for the marriage.

Another Fact About Relationships Is that it may not be the sexiest premarital convo but talking about money issues now rather than later could save you a world of heartache.

Early finance-related arguments are the top predictor of divorce and it appliance across all income and wealth levels.

So pour a glass of wine and start talking financial histories and money expectations.


  1. The honeymoon phase may be a myth.

Last Fact About Relationships for this blog post, don’t get too hung up on the hot-and-heavy phase fizzling out, as the honeymoon phase may be more of a myth than a reality.

In reality, couples are happiest after their first year of marriage. What’s more, newlyweds reported having a lower happiness score than couples who had been married for a long time

  1. Most couples wait six years before going to marriage counseling ― but you should go sooner.

The average couple who visits a marriage counsellor has been struggling for about six years. By that time, some therapists say the damage has already been done. It’s much smarter to go as soon as you start to get serious when things between you and your special someone are going relatively smoothly.

It’s OK to go to counselling when things seem ‘fine’ so that you are more resilient when they aren’t.


For Men Sexual Health issues in your life,  visit our Men’s Clinic Johanneburg for consultation.